When Exercise Systems Talk Back

I really do love to exercise, but I am easily bored. So, I change it up all the time. I often walk or I move to the Wii Fit, the P90X videos (when I’m feelin’ crazy), or a dance DVD.

Last year about this time I purchased the Jenny McCarthy exercise program for the Wii called, “Your Shape”. The package includes a DVD and a small camera. The idea is that the user mirrors Jenny’s avatar and the camera captures the user’s movements. The system senses whether or not the consumer is in sync with Ms. McCarthy.

I plugged in the camera, slid the DVD into the Wii system, turned on the TV, and started to exercise.

Jenny’s cartoon image began stretching and moving on my TV screen, while my image was captured by the camera and projected in a small box in the lower right hand corner of the television. I mirrored her movements perfectly. The camera, however, had a slight delay. This means it APPEARED that I was behind.

Suddenly, Jenny starts talking to me. “It seems you’re having difficulty with this move. We’ll slow down a bit.” Jenny McCarthy is berating me. Are you kidding?

I move closer to the camera in hopes it sees me more clearly.

“Okay. Are you ready?” Jenny prods. “Let’s go!”

We stretch and reach. I can see my image in the corner of the television and the camera is still not reading me properly. My arms are up over my head, but the “me” on the screen looks like she’s moving in slow motion.

“You still seem to be having trouble with this move.”

I am not having trouble, Jenny McCarthy, and I don’t like your tone!

I popped the DVD out of the player, unplugged the camera, and repackaged the whole stickin’ thing. Jenny had been in my home for less than 30 minutes, and I was ready to send her packing!

I drove to Costco, walked up to the return counter, and handed the yellow box back to the woman.

“Is there anything wrong with the product?”

“Yeah! Jenny McCarthy is talking smack about me.” The lovely cashier handed me my money, and I headed home.

Now excuse me while I put on my P90X DVD’s. That guy can’t see me so as far as he knows I rock! And a bonus—he’s way cuter than Jenny!